you're not alone

The question "why?" is brought up many times a day in anyones life, but often we aren't supposed to know the answer. Why do people have to argue? Why can't we find peace? Why do good people die? Why do I feel so alone? Some of these questions can only be answered by ourselves, but others may never be resolved while we're alive. One thing that has always brought me more comfort is knowing that I am never alone, in this chaotic world filled with shifting values and uncertain futures, I can always count on the knowledge that I have a loving Father in Heaven. Being LDS has provided me with the knowledge that I, not only, am a child of God, but that I can communicate and receive comfort and reconciliation whenever I need that helping hand.

You're not alone,
there is more to this i know.
You can make it out,
you will live to tell.

We don't always know what is in store for us or why something happens, but knowing everything happens for a reason puts it in perspective. Knowing that God has a plan is all we really need. No matter how alone we feel, how far the depths of despair have taken us, how many people have walked out. We are never alone. You are never alone.

This is not an easy task. It is intended to be difficult, challenging, and ultimately refining

hear you me

May angels lead you in,
hear you me, my friends.
On sleepless roads the sleepless go,
may angels lead you in.

Is it ever the "right" time for someone to leave this life? Sometimes a death is expected, other times it is the last thing you could imagine, but no matter the timing or circumstances, it is never easy. This week has been one that I hope doesn't become common for me, on Saturday our institute director Brother Van passed away and today one of Josh's best friends, Matt, also passed on. Two very different circumstances, but similar feelings could be found. At Brother Van's funeral service there was much talk of good times and most of it was spent honoring the many great things Brother Van had done in his life. You could tell that Brother Van was at peace as was his family. Matt's passing wasn't quite as expected. He was involved in an accident on Monday and didn't make it through his surgery today. I've never met Matt, but he knew who I was and wrote me a letter asking me to do him a favor. From his words I could tell he was at peace with whatever happened and that he was ok with dying. He was only in his mid-20's, but he knew that even when we aren't expecting things, we have to take them in stride. None of us know when our time here is going to be fulfilled, but that gives us every reason to live in the moment and love with everything that we have. We weren't sent here just to be alive, we were sent to live and to enjoy. Who knows the impact we might have on those around us? Who can put on paper the number of people we influence in one day? When our time comes are we going to be happy we lived, or disappointed that we didn't get enough time? The decision is ours and ours alone.

to all the crowded rooms

Music speaks what cannot be expressed, soothes the mind and gives it rest, heals the heart and makes it whole, flows from heaven to the soul.

All people enjoy music, but to truly understand music and feel the connection it has on the soul is a quality many strive for. To me, music is more than just pretty words arranged with a nice melody. Music is feeling, music is soul, music is passion. Take away any of those qualities and music becomes just a tune, background noise lost in the chaos of life. Whether it is the hauntingly beautiful melody, the steadily pulsing beat, or the astoundingly profound lyrics, a song will affect every person a little differently. The ability for music to cater to so many different personalities and still be sincere in every aspect is what gives a song it's true power. I have the utmost respect for musicians and lyricists because of the impact they've had, not only in my life, but in the life of so many of my friends. Music is one of the greatest things to grace this planet and my life has been changed more than once by music. Being able to be a part of the emotions created by a band is a feeling unlike anything else. Connecting with the music brings definition to times of confusion and struggle. I couldn't imagine a life without music, without the joy brought by the passion of creation.

And I'll give blood to your dry veins
We do this for the passion and not the fashion or fame

We will capture you in open arms
When you're tired and alone

thunder

one thing I really love about Texas is the storms. In Utah when it rains, it's just kind of depressing and cloudy and drizzly, but Texas, now that's a whole new story. Rains in Texas come with thunder, lightning, power. The pure beauty of a storm can only be appreciated with all the elements involved. Thrashing rain, cracking lightning, booming thunder, the elements that terrify you, yet amaze you at the same time. The power behind a storm is incomprehensible and unrestrained, it's a power similar to so many of the emotions we experience in our lives. Just as we can't control or predict a storm, our lives change so often that trying to work everything out is like trying to catch a storm. Emotions are unpredictable, people affect us in ways we didn't expect, we lose those closest to us. We are constantly rocked and battered by the storms of life, but is that a reason not to appreciate them? Yes, a storm can do so much damage, but think of the rain. Think of the life brought by what many fear. That's the thing about storms, they can be things of destruction or things of beauty. It's all in how we look at it. Perspective is everything in life. Those storms that may have seemingly destroyed everything may actually have been the best thing to happen in life. Some people don't realize that we're supposed to experience storms. Life isn't supposed to be perfect, we can't spend our whole lives trying to wait for that perfect opportunity. We can't spend our whole lives waiting for it to get better. We have to make our own lives better, we have to use the storms to help us grow.

"Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass,
it's about learning to dance in the rain"